Sunday, April 27, 2008

Endless 'To Do' List....

The last few days I felt kind of down because I felt a pretty much like an idiot when I got it through my thick skull that I couldn't take this hostess job for a second longer. I thought it was going to be easier than it was, can you say wrong?
So I was feeling like a total spazz for not being able to cut it. Now Tuesday monring I have an interview for this company downtown and I can't wait! (Yes, it's the one I mentioned in my previous post.)

I can't believe the New Earth classes on Oprah.com are almost over, I have to catch up on like four weeks of the book. I've totally gotten distracted by everything that's been happening the job at Universal Studios that I sucked at, the ACT test and oh yeah I'll have to retake that because I totally fucked it up. Aside from that I've been working on my room because I'm no where near packed, which is one of the reasons why we're staying in this apartment another month. Why is moving so freaking complicated!

Anyways tonight I'm sitting here listening to Melissa Etheridge thinking about all the changes that have been happening in my life these passed few months. It's not that I'm not happy about it, it's simply that I feel like a total dork for not catching up to things faster. Ether way I'm alright, better than alright I'm content... at least for the time being.

Now if only I could get this college to be a thing checked on my To Do list, I'd be a little less stressed. but I'm trying to put into practice the New Earth Principles. I'll live is what I'm trying to say...

Laters
XOXOXO

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Hostess no more....

So working as a hostess was not even close to what I was expecting and after two days I quit. It was way too much for me and I just couldn't take it. So I'm going back to reception jobs, I applied for some and this one that starts at $10.00 full time.

On another note: I don't know what is wrong but I have like no freaking desire to work on my music, it's like I have no passion. Somewhere along the line I lost my way. It used to be all about the music, I couldn't wait to practice and now I pretty much dread it. But I'm making it change one way or another, I realized I'm not present when I practice. I sing just for the hell of it because I feel like I have to. That's not how I should be approaching something that used to give me so much joy. I think I have let the stresses and distractions of my life derail me from the path I was on, I need to make little goals for myself. Kind of like stepping stones and take it one step at a time.


Well I'm off...
XOXOXOXO

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Finally over!.....

I don't think I can express how happy I am that this week is over! I really was starting to think it was never going to finish. I met with one of my managers today and I start training this Tuesday. I can't believe in all the chaos I managed to see one seriously hot guy, Chef and so tall. At least it's entertainment haha... My feet are killing me and I'm so tired I can't think.

I'm off to bed.... ZZzzzzzz.........

Laters
XOXOXO

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Feeling Naughty....

Why do I enjoy being naughty so much? Usually I'm a very responsible, and mature person but then I have my days when I'm utterly naughty. They're my favorite to be honest. Since I'm avoiding the whole dating thing until I find someone who at the very least peaks my interest I occasionally talk with M he's a friend that knows how to bring out my naughty side, I wonder if it's because he's older? I think so, but I'm so not in the mood to psychoanalyze myself right now. It's just so effortless, too bad I don't get to see him often, I'd like to. However I do know it couldn't be much more than it is. We are just too different, but at least I know the sex is good. What's the harm in that?

Laters
XOXOXO

Friday, April 18, 2008

Note to the readers....

Tonight I while watching the Oprah episode from this afternoon I decided to edit a post and to my surprise I found 4 comments from previous posts. I'm so happy to hear your feedback, while it's true I post on often about all these thoughts I have bouncing around in my head I do like the interaction with people I may or may not know. If there's one thing I've learned in the last couple of years is that we are all different in many ways but deep down we're all the same because we're all human. I want to take the time to say thank you to all of you who read my blog and took time to comment, please keep it up, I love hearing from you and it really means a lot to know that my thoughts aren't just going out into the great black hole that is the internet. Because I've gotten a few messages on MySpace asking about where they can send E-mails I've made a new one LoLuv25@live.com

Looking forward to reading more from my readers... lol ok even I had to laugh at that one : )
Before I go I wanted to mention that I am on several sites and if you like the blog please vote for it.

Laters
XOXOXO


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Late morning blogging.....

To tell you the truth it's almost 11am and I have done absolutely nothing productive with my day. I'm listening to Nelly Furtado and updating my blog mostly because I can and because I'm home with nothing to do until Sunday when I go to finish my orientation, yay!... not. I'm dying to start working at the restaurant, I'm looking forward to being a hostess. There are so many things I'm going to learn, and I have to say I love the perks!

Home life- We're still packing (and have a looonnngg way to go.) for the big move in a couple of weeks to the new apartment. My mom is totally on edge these days, so temperamental. I don't know entirely why because she refuses to tell me.

Oh.. I forgot to mention this weekend I'm going to Mardi Gras at Universal Studios! I'm so excited, it's going to be so fun. Earth, Wind, and Fire is performing, and I'm planning on having a few drinks because I'm not with my parents and damn it after the week I've had I disserve a freaking drink!
I'll post some pictures next week when I get them back.

Laters
XOXOXO

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Still figuring this shit out.....

It bugs me so much that while I'm still getting used to this whole "adult" thing that I'm getting pressure to figure it out soon because I'm already 21 and apparently should have by now. Who the hell said that when you turn 18 you are handed the "Adulthood Manual: The guide to living life and making choices" what the fuck?!? It's like one night I went to bed at 17 and the next day I start hearing things like "well you should know that you're an adult now." again WHAT THE FUCK!? I have never pretended to know all the answers because I so don’t... so why am I now expected to magically have my life together at 21? I just don't get why it is that people who are two and three times my age who still are not even close to figuring life, much less them selves out are telling me I really need to get on the ball. Can we say oxymoron?

Don't even get my started on this whole purpose thing, I'm still reading A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle (even though the web class is on chapter 7, going on 8 and I'm still on 4 because I had to put it off to study for the ACT.) and while I'll admit, I have learned a hell of a lot about myself I am still not much closer to "figuring" it all out. Grrrahhhh!... It's so damn frustrating! There's this song by LeAnn Rimes called What I Cannot Change and it's totally what I'm going through right now, If you want to listen to it check out my MySpace Page

This Monday I started orientation at my new job and while I enjoyed it for the most part I had a tougher day yesterday when I sort of twisted (or is it sprained) my ankle. So I had to take today off and reschedule for Sunday. Bright side? I get to sleep in the next few days... hahaha I guess my clumsiness kind of paid off. Down side? My lips are so chapped it hurts to smile.

Well I'm off to bed, the Vicodin I took for my ankle is kicking in.

Laters
XOXOXO

Monday, April 14, 2008

Why is life so complicated?....

Is a question I was asked tonight... In my opinion is life isn't really all that complicated, we all have and make choices, whether good or bad. Over the passed almost three years I've learned a lot about life and about myself. I've done more soul searching than I care to admit, pretty much to the point where I was sick of myself. But I have to admit it made me a better person, maybe I'm not as kind or delicate as some would like me to be but I am stronger and smarter for it. I've grown up a lot in the last few months, reading A New Earth by Echart Tolle has really helped me change my ways for the better. However the road to awareness and overall consciousness is a journey that must not be taken lightly, and everyone comes to it on their own time in their own way.
You are given the tools and all you can do is work with them. It's pretty simple when you think about it isn't it?
Until next time
XOXOXO